Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
