What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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