I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
