I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
