That's intense
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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