Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize