If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
