Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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