Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Randomize