and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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