Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
everyone is single if you try hard enough
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
