Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i think i have herpe
just one?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
