I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
