you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Randomize