This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
