He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
