I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
