That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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