we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
