I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
