My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
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