Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Randomize
