About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
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