I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
