Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I could fuck to npr.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
soo... how was my night?
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
