Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
