I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
We have so much sex to catch up on
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
