I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
