She is in my trunk
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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