do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
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