Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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