You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
the night ended with taco bell and tears
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Everyone says I win the strip club
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
