im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
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