one word: firstdatebathroomanal
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I wish i was in the wii world.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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