i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
