Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
