hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
