is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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