everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Boobs are out for the taking
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize
