What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize