I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
