is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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