Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
