Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
