I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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