But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
