Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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