Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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