handjob tips. give me some.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
