I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize