u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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