I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize
